While other mums out there lavish their kids not only with the things
they need but also with the things they do not need, I lavish mine with time –
plenty of time, because that is what I have most. I don’t have the luxury to
pamper my kids with extravagant clothes, and expensive food high with saturated
fats. That’s how mean I am. For while other kids eat lechon, fried chicken,
French fries, donuts, and drink sodas, my kids are taught to enjoy dishes of
vegetables and fish, red rice, fruits of different colors and they are required
to be hydrated with water and milk. Sodas and powdered juice drinks are aliens
in our house. Although sometimes their grannies give them some, they are aware
that they are not allowed, not in my sight. Besides, they have no choice, I do
the grocery and I do the cooking. That is how mean I am.
I am a mean mum. I resolve to teach my kids to let go of their toys
when they have outgrown them already. Yes they would have lesser number of toys
to count but they would soon see that other kids will be happy with
hand-me-downs from them. They could frown and others would be beaming with joy.
They have to deal with that. And while other kids get slides and sea-saws and
cars and bikes inside their houses, my kids will be introduced to the park and
experience conventional and outrageous play and see for themselves how the world
revolves outside. That’s when they’ll learn to explore more. Because I am a mean
mum, that’s what they can expect.
I demand time from my husband. Remember that I am mean. While
other kids spend time with their yaya’s to the point of exhaustion, I deem it
necessary to have my kids spend time with me and their working dad to the point
of desperation. Right this very young age, I want them to experience family
bonding because one day they will have to define the term bond
and I won’t allow them not to. That’s how mean I am.
Television is banned in the house. At least until age five. Because I
value literacy too much, I opt to save money for books and not for Samsung or
Sony Bravia or the rumored futuristic Apple TV. While other kids soak their eyes
on the screen and let the Tazmanian Devil or Bananas in Pyjamas or Sponge Bob
feed them with talks and thoughts, I choose to soak my kids in imaginings
brought by the fantastic stories of Tikitiki-Tembo, Peter Rabbit, The Cat in the
Hat, Mother Goose, the Berensteins, and many more illustrative characters. I
will lead them to the world of Narnia and guide them through A Wrinkle in Time.
No TV, just papers and ink. That’s how mean I am.
My son will be taught how to guard, protect, value, and love her
younger sister. He is not allowed to enjoy the many once in a lifetime chances
of bullying her. He won’t die if that will be forced out of his system and no
one could have the right to say to him “You miss half of your life”. In the same
way, his sister will be taught how to respect, support, love and look up to her
kuya. She is not allowed to bully him and be a monstress
character. That is how they are to act. And they must know that I intend to see
them be who they are supposed to be, because I am mean.
I know they won’t be kids forever. I was once a high school student who
had a mean mama too. She did her meanest to drive away the suitors. But when in
college, I did my best to sneak out. But my children have to learn that I’m
meaner than my mama. While I’m their mum, they have to learn how to Kiss Dating
Goodbye while still studying. And they will surely be aware that I will do my
best to spoil the fun of sneaking out, and of texting too much, and of emailing
pseudonymous people. I will be good at spoiling crushing on cuties that can
crush their spirit. Oh yeah I am mean!
Sometimes I don’t delight in being mean. But it’s one way I know to
make sure my kids grow to be highly healthy and so long as it is effective, I
resolve to be one. And when the right time comes, I hope my daughter becomes
mean too and I hope my son finds a wife as mean as I am. So
im a proud